Islamic Procreation As Sex Jihad

Narrated Jabir bin `Abdullah: When I got married, Allah’s Messenger said to me, “What type of lady have you married?” I replied, “I have married a matron’ He said, “Why, don’t you have a liking for the virgins and for fondling them?” Jabir also said: Allah’s Messenger said, “Why didn’t you marry a young girl so that you might play with her and she with you?’ (Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 7, Book 62, Hadith 17 https://sunnah.com/bukhari:5080)

Narrated Jabir: My father died and left behind seven or nine daughters, and I married a woman. The Prophet said, “Did you get married, O Jabir?” I replied, “Yes.” He asked, “Is she a virgin or a matron?” I replied, “She is a matron.” He said, “Why didn’t you marry a virgin girl so that you might play with her and she with you (or, you might make her laugh and she make you laugh)?” I said, “My father died, leaving seven or nine girls (orphans) and I did not like to bring a young girl like them, so I married a woman who can look after them.” He said, “May Allah bestow His Blessing on you.” (Sahih al-Bukhari, Volume 8, Book 75, Hadith 396 https://sunnah.com/bukhari:6387)

Narrated Ma’qil bin Yasar: It was narrated that Ma’qil bin Yasar said: “A man came to the Messenger of Allah and said: ‘I have found a woman who is from a good family and of good status, but she does not bear children, should I marry her?’ He told him not to. Then he came to him a second time and he told him not to (marry her). Then he came to him a third time and he told him not to (marry her), then he said: ‘Marry the one who is fertile and loving, for I will boast of your great numbers.'”

It was narrated from Aishah that: the Messenger of Allah said: “Marriage is part of my sunnah, and whoever does not follow my sunnah has nothing to do with me. Get married, for I will boast of your great numbers before the nations. Whoever has the means, let him get married, and whoever does not, then he should fast for it will diminish his desire.”

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah that: the Messenger of Allah said: “Marry, for I will boast of your great numbers.”

The Messenger encouraged marriage to women who are fertile. It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: The Messenger of Allah used to say: “Marry the one who is loving and fertile, for I will feel proud of your large numbers before the other Prophets on the Day of Resurrection.” Narrated by Ahmad (12202). Classed as saheeh by Ibn Hibbaan (3/338) and by al-Haythami in Majma’ al-Zawaa’id (4/474).

Sham al-Deen Abaadi said:

Wudood (loving) means she loves her husband.

Wulood (fertile) means the one who bears many children.

These two conditions are mentioned together because if a fertile woman is not loving, her husband will feel no desire for her, and if a loving woman is not fertile, the desired aim will not be achieved, which is to increase the numbers of the ummah by producing many children. These two characteristics may be known in the case of virgins from the behaviour of their relatives, because in most cases relatives are similar in behaviour and characteristics.

‘Awn al-Ma’bood (6/33-34)

The Prophet told men not to marry infertile women. It was narrated that Ma’qil ibn Yasaar said: A man came to the Prophet and said: I have found a woman who is of good lineage and beautiful, but she cannot have children. Should I marry her? He said: No. Then he came to him a second time, and he told him not (to marry that woman). Then he came to him a third time and he said: “Marry the one who is loving and fertile, for I will be proud of your great numbers before the nations.” Narrated by al-Nasaa’i (3227) and Abu Dawood (2050). Classed as saheeh by Ibn Hibbaan (9/363) and by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Targheeb (1921).

This prohibition does not mean that it is haram, rather it is makrooh [discouraged, disliked]. The scholars stated that choosing a fertile woman is mustahabb [recommended], not obligatory.

Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni:

It is mustahabb that she be from a family whose women are known to bear many children. End quote.

Al-Manaawi said in Fayd al-Qadeer (6. hadeeth 9775):

Marrying a woman who is not fertile is makrooh. End quote.

Just as it is permissible for a woman to marry an infertile man, it is also permissible for a man to marry an infertile woman.

Al-Haafiz said in al-Fath:

As for one who cannot have children or who has no desire for women or for intimacy, this (marriage) is permissible in his case, if the woman is aware of that and agrees to it. End quote. (Islamqa.info, Is it haram to marry a woman who cannot have children?; emphasis mine)

Question

I have read that in Islam best women are those who are loving and can have lot of children. I can understand the loving side but women don’t have any control on how many children they can have. Why the women who can have children considered superior to women who cannot have children even though this is not under their control? Prophet stopped one of his companions marrying a woman who could not have children and I have also read that Hazarat Umar divorced two of his wives because they were barren. Why are women punished for something which is not under their control? Why are they denied of love and care how will they be able get married? It seems that women who cannot have children are sort of outcast as I have read some scholars consider it Mukroh to marry a woman who cannot have children. Why this restriction only applies to women and not men? Men can be infertile too.

Answer

… As for the prophetic narrations that encourage marrying a fertile woman, then this is in order to achieve some religious benefits, like having many children and the like. The Prophet said: “Marry the loving and prolific women, as I will outnumber the nations by you [by your abundant number].” [Ahmad] Such narrations do not necessarily mean that a woman who is not prolific is not virtuous.

However, we do not know any religious evidence that prohibits marrying a barren person, be it a man or a woman; rather, the religious texts that encourage marriage are general. In addition to this, being chaste is an additional benefit in marriage, and probably, every man and woman seek to achieve chastity.

As for the narration reported by Imaam Ahmad Ma’qil Ibn Yasaar narrated that a man came to the Prophet and said: “I have found a woman of honourable lineage and beauty, but she does not give birth to children. Should I marry her? He said: “No”. He [the man] later returned again, and he prohibited him. The man returned for the third time, and he (the Prophet) said: “Marry women who are loving and very prolific, for I shall outnumber the nations (on the Day of Resurrection) by you [by your abundant number].” This narration advocates what is better, and highlights the benefit of multiplying the progeny, as we mentioned above.

‘Umar married a barren woman from Bani Makhzoom and then he divorced her and said: “I do not sleep with women only for enjoyment; if they do not give birth, I do not need them.”

‘Umar practiced a permissible right to divorce, just like a woman has the right to ask for divorce if her husband is barren, because both of them need to be blessed with children. The ruling here applies to both the husband and the wife. (Islamweb.net, The status of the barren women in Islam; emphasis mine)

And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the captives and the slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice. S. 4:3 Hilali-Khan

Question:

How many kids can a Muslim have?

Answer:

… There is no limit in Islamic legislation about the number of children that one is allowed to have, one is not forbidden to have a maximum number [and he should not limit himself to a specific number].

However, Islamic legislation encouraged us to increase the progeny and marry women who can bear children. The Prophet said: “Marry women who are loving and very prolific, for I shall outnumber the nations by you on the Day of Resurrection.” [Abu Daawood]

So it is encouraged in religion to have as many children as one can because this is filling the Earth with the obedience of Allaah and His worship, holding the word of Allaah high, and increasing the progeny.

Multiplying the progeny is also a provision for the person in this worldly life and in the Hereafter especially if one nurtures his children according to Islamic principles and good moral conduct.

The Prophet said: “When a man dies, his deeds come to an end, except for three: a continuous charity, knowledge that benefits people and a pious child who supplicates for him.” [Ahmad]

Allaah Knows best. (Islamweb.net, Number of children a Muslim can have; emphasis mine)